Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Edge-a-ma-cation on the Streets

I've mentioned before how I ride my trusty Citizen bike to work. There are a few things I've learned on my erratic adventure-filled mornings in the Miami urban jungle. I will share them with you now.

1. Biscayne Blvd. is a great place to shatter glass.
Got some empty beer and liquor bottles lying around? Too lazy to throw them in the recycle bin? Then come on down to Biscayne Blvd (preferably between 79th and 42nd st) and break those pesky glass bottles in the street. Yes, there's plenty of nice glass-shattering concrete available to satisfy even the drunkest crackhead on his way back from renting a motel room at the hourly rate.

2. Moms in minivans are the worst.
Enough of all this talk about minivans being so safe. Maybe for the passengers, but certainly not for your friendly neighborhood bike rider. Each time I see a minivan pull out of a parking space or try to turn onto the street I make sure to make eye-contact with the mother load otherwise you know that they are gonna heave themselves out there without looking in both directions because they are going nuts with junior in the backseat smearing chocolate all over the velvet seats and you know they wish they were driving an Audi but no they had to buy the minivan because of carpool and AND AND!!! Believe me, I know, my own mumsey owned a Ford Windstar ("Windstaah" for us Bostonians) and being a passenger was like riding in an unwieldy barrel that's been tossed down the hill in a Loony Toons cartoon.

3. Crossing Guards are the sweetest.
The nicest people. Really, take a moment to thank your crossing guard next time you see him or her.

4. The silence when the bridge goes up is sublime.
Recently when I ride across the causeway the bridge has been up and rather than get annoyed with the minimum 6-minute wait until the bridge resumes its position, I take the time to enjoy the silence of all the cars being forced to wait patiently until they can roar over the bridge's metal grilling. I catch my breath, walk my bike up to the drawn gate and look out over the sparkling Biscayne Bay. Beautiful. This is why people live in Miami. It's nice to be reminded of that sometimes...Maybe I should take a jet ski to work...

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