Pecha Kucha @ Art Salon

Basel Shwag

Well, it's not really shwag so much as the opportunity to buy cool stuff. In honor of Art Basel Interview mag is commandeering the high-tech vending machine at the Mondrian and stuffing it with collectibles like Dolce & Gabanna's "We Love Madonna" tank, canvas kicks from Vena Cava, and Scott Campbell knuckle tattoo sets. Oh, and a lifetime supply of Ben & Jerry’s in case you get hungry.
starts December 1, 1100 West Ave, 305-514-1500.

Monday: Nektar de Stagni Jewelry Salon

Borsht Film Fest, Saturday Night

Catch the next Brett Ratner (pre-Rush Hour franchise) at this indie fest with screenings of short films that each take place in a specific Miami neighborhood including Downtown Surfside, Liberty City, Key Biscayne, and the Design District. Admission is pay what you wish and there will be complimentary cocktails.
7pm, November 28, 174 E Flagler St, 305-372-0925.

Basel Tidbits

File under Basel 2009 miscellany:

• This year's Art Loves Music free concert on the beach Wednesday night features the aural stylings of the lovely Ebony Bones.
• There will be no Art Positions aka "the container show" on the beach this year. Instead the galleries involved in Art Positions will be featured inside the convention hall and the space on the beach will called Oceanfront Cafe. The container show was always more of a hassle when it got crowded but on the plus side, it was nice to see free art. Now you have to buy a ticket to the main fair if you want to check out those edgy galleries.
• Local artistic duo and makers of happy art Friends With You will be opening their first boutique in the Design District Tuesday night. I am particuarly jazzed about this as my little one loves his plush Rainbow TTT purchased by a friend at the MAM store. Their stuff is wildly fun.

Surface Lounge

For those of you who prefer liquid lunches to actually getting through the day sober (during Basel week, that is highly discouraged) will want to mosey on over to Plunge at the Gansevoort where Surface mag will be pouring free drinks from 11am-1pm from December 3-5. RSVP here.

Basel Buzz

It's that time of year again, folks. Let the wild rumpus start.

Some of the things we've been hearing about here at APD headquarters:

The W South Beach will be the epicenter of art-world scalawags, carpetbaggers and legit celebs. Vito Schnabel (son of superstar Julian) will be hosting something called the Happy Endings art installation opening party there Wednesday night. That same night Art Nexus is throwing their megabash in the backyard while dealer Larry Gagosian hosts his annual dinner at Mr. Chow.

Friday night developers David Edelstein and Aby Rosen host a shindig featuring performance by Glen Matlock of THE SEX PISTOLS, Jesse Yusef Murphy of the Brazilian Girls and HykCast at WET at while artist Francesco Clemente gets jiggy at an after party at WALL.
So basically, if you want to hobnob with the sexy crowd you'll want to park yourself at the W's lobby bar and see if you can charm your way into one of these invite-only events. Or just pretend you're friends with Vito.

(photo of Mr. Chow via Greg Clark)

Happy Hour @ Caviar Kaspia

The pricey French caviar restaurant at the Webster just introduced a wallet-friendly post-work ritual: $8 cocktails including lychee martnis and mojitos along with Russian-inspired bites for $10 like mini smoked salmon blinis and a baked potato “Vladivostok” topped with salmon caviar. Yes, it's still a bit steep for "happy hour" but it's a nice way to snack on what the restaurant does well - the baked potato and the fluffy, spongy blinis.

These delicate toast rounds topped with a not-too-salty tarama are presented as gratis cocktail snacks which is a nice touch. They're also indicative of the overall vibe of the place - precise, fastidious, even a bit precious. The Webster house cocktail, made with champagne and lavender pearls is a fragrant way to take the edge off.

4pm-7pm, Tuesdays-Saturdays, 1220 Collins Ave, 305- 674-7899.

Key Lime My, Oh My

What business does The Oceanaire Seafood Room have serving such a damn good key lime pie? As if having dozens of fresh fish, roughly a bajillion types of oysters and every kind of crustacean known to man wasn't enough, they go and churn out a kick ass slab of pie. Damn you, retro supper club, damn you. Now I'll never fit into my skinny jeans.

Free Concert Courtesy of Diesel, Tuesday Night

All Diesel fans will have a chance to witness this private event with a limited amount of invitations to be given away starting at 4pm on Saturday, November 14th through Tuesday, November 17th, at Diesel stores as well as Bloomingdale’s located at the Aventura Mall.

Diesel Lincoln Road – 933 Lincoln Road
Diesel Avenutra – 19501 Biscayne Boulevard
Diesel Miami Beach – 801 Washington Avenue
Bloomingdale’s Aventura (men’s and women’s Diesel Departments)-19555 Biscayne Boulevard

In addition, Diesel’s Lincoln Road will kick-off the festivities with a nightly Happy Hour including cocktails, DJ’s and shopping. Happy Hour commences on Saturday the 14th and continues for an additional three nights.

Cookie Monkey Cookies Are Effing Delicious

The Keebler Elves got nothing on Miami resident Marisa Scime. Armed with grandmother's cookie recipe and a willingness to explore uncharted baking waters, the cookie goddess will bake any kind of cookie you desire, incorporating the candy, liquor or food craving of choice. So far she's been commissioned to make bacon cookies but she's open to anything. She dropped off a few of her chocolate chip classics for me to try and they are great - chewy, moist and flecked with both milk chocolate and semi-sweet chips along with macadamia nuts. More info on how to order and how the cookie maven got started here.

Anthony Bourdain: Saucy Outtakes

Rabble rouser and epicurean adventurer Anthony Bourdain will be in town hosting a Celebrity Chef event at the Arsht Center Friday night with Eric Ripert and Jacques Pepin. I learned quite a few things from our short conversation, namely fatherhood has tamed the churlish chef, that pig should be a condiment and that he really dislikes Mr. Chow.

Here's a bit of Q & A for you to digest.

Has becoming a father affected the badass side of your personality?
I think any notions of being a badass evaporated immediately upon seeing my gorgous daughter appear on this planet. It’s all a hollow joke, the idea of being cool, immediately upon having a child.

What’s your favorite drink?
I’m a big fan of the negroni. If I’m sitting in Italy, late afternoon, a negroni on the rocks with a hunk of orange in it is a nice way to usher in the evening.

Any locations for your show that are off-limits for safety or security reasons?
We’re trying to shoot in the Democratic Republic of Congo because I’m fascinated by Conrad and the history of colonialism. I’d love to shoot in Iran, where I understand the people are very friendly but the government doesn’t make it very conducive to an American shooting something there.

What is the one place everyone should see before they die?
Tokyo. Or Shanghai or Beijing. At least to see the future to know what the world will look like when they’re gone. If you want to see who our futre master will be and what the world will look like in twenty years Beijing is a good start.

Because China is going to rule the world.
At least we’ll be eating better.

What’s the best music to cook to?
During the prep period Curtis Mayfield’s soundtrack to Superfly works for me.

If you could only pick three condiments/spices to have for the rest of your life what would they be?
Salt, pepper and a pig.

Pig as a condiment?
It would be in my world.

So…Mr. Chow. I take it you’re not a fan?
Mr. Chow is like the Cipriani of Chinese food. It’s for alleged douchebags who are allegedly not paying enough for their alleged food. It’s for people with small penises. It’s the worst place on earth. When you find yourself at Mr. Chow you need to take a long hard look in the mirror and ask, what has my life come to? Because you have to be in desperate fucking straits to find yourself paying that much money for food you can get better six blocks away.

About Last Night @ Pacific Time

Complimentary cocktails and bar bites (sweet and sour shrimp, crab wontons) from 8-9pm, and the party goes until midnight.

35 NE 40th St. 305-722-7369.

Free Entree @ Ishq

I've only eaten at Ishq once and it was alright. Been meaning to go back and give it another try but the thought of braving Ocean Drive and their way-too-high for Indian prices ($19.95 for saag paneer?) always turned me off. Plus, a great new Indian place just opened on Key Biscayne (more on that later). But they've reopened after a summer hiatus and are offering a free second entree for dinner so maybe it's time to pay them a visit. Download the coupon here.
530 Ocean Drive, 305-532-4747.

Bargain Burgers @ Steak 954

We had a great meal at Stephen Starr’s bastion of beef at the W Ft. Lauderdale when it opened a few months ago. We've been meaning to get back there, and now that the restaurant just slashed the price on their signature burger and fries to a namesake-worthy $9.54 it's a pretty attractive lunch option. Now that the weather's cooling down, dining out on the patio overlooking A1A sounds downright decadent.
11am-2:30pm, weekdays, 401 N Fort Lauderdale Beach Blvd, 954-414-8333.

2 For 1 Lobsters @ Andu

I grew up in Massachusetts, where lobsters are cheap and you can buy them at Cape Cod gas stations and eat them on salty dockside tables so this deal at Andu sounds about right. On Tuesdays the Mediterranean bistro on Brickell is giving away two 1.5-pound lobsters for the usual price of one ($28.95).
141 SW 7th St, 786-871-7005.

Wino Mondays @ Bourbon Steak

Miami Spice may be over, but the bargain-priced gluttony continues at this cushy Aventura steakhouse. All 850 bottles of wine on their epic list are fifty per cent off on Mondays. Meaning a bottle of Duckhorn Sauvignon Blanc can be had for $18 or you could spring for the ’96 Opus One at $210. It’s cheaper than flying to Napa. Check out the wine list here.

Bourbon Steak, 19999 West Country Club Dr, 786-279-6600.